Illegal Cockfight

The Honolulu Police Department received reports of illegal cockfights being held in  the Ewa area and quickly dispatched the infamous Detective Chang to investigate.  He  reported to his sargeant the next morning.  ‘Get tree main groups in da cock fighting hui,’ he began.

‘Good work. Who are they?’ the sargeant asked.

Chang replied confidently, ‘Get haoles, Portagees, and da Syndicate.’

Puzzled, the sergeant asked, ‘So how you wen find dat out in one night?’

‘Wuz easy cuz,’ he replied, ‘I wen Ewa side and watched da cockfight.  Can tell had haoles cuz one duck was entered in da fight.’

The sergeant nodded, ‘But what about da others?’

Chang answered, ‘Well, I figah get Portagees cuz someone wen’ bet on da duck.’

‘Okay,’ said the sergeant, ‘And how you wen know dat da Syndicate was involved?’

‘Da duck wen  win.’

thanks, ES
[note: say it like it looks, you’ll sound local]


  1. GoodOleBoy said,

    Wednesday 17th March 2010 at 4:49 am

    You need to understand not everyone understands Hawaiian terms. I don’t put Russian in my posts for the same reason. Or is your site for Hawaiians only. What are haoles, and Portagees.

    • hepsy said,

      Monday 22nd March 2010 at 12:23 pm

      Any place where people speak English as a second language, or where people speak English improperly, there’s pidgin. This is pidgin. It’s pronounced like it’s written, as some people speak.
      One of the three Hawaiian words, haole, is used as slang to mean caucasian. The others are place names, as unfamiliar to some as Effingham:).
      Portagee is the same as used elsewhere.

  2. GoodOleBoy said,

    Monday 22nd March 2010 at 4:43 pm

    Effingham is good old English so I guess Portuguese is Portagee? Shouldn’t standard English be a part of the dialect after 230 years? Or is it cute ebonics?

    • hepsy said,

      Monday 22nd March 2010 at 5:31 pm

      So is Portagee. It’s on Wikipedia, too.
      I never heard of Effingham until I looked for some place an Illinoisan would know of that that rest of US may not.
      Is that an Illinoisan duck?

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